saved evidence

saved evidence

if you don’t send them to camp…this is evidence of my daughter & I, playing. the photo was taken about 9 years ago.
I have been informed that I don’t do anything with my children. I love when I am able to come up with examples of me doing exactly that. Summer vacation is very difficult for mothers & children. The structure (school or daycare) that they’d relied upon to get them through their day is over, and the teachers gladly drop kicked them out the door. GO HOME! Today is very different from what it was when I grew up (1970’s). The age of technology is here, the summers of my past are just that, in the past.

The guilt that comes with motherhood is like ketchup is with fries, you can’t have one without the other. My children can apply guilt as though they have a master’s degree in it. I’ve been a mother for about 17 years, so I may not have the all the answers, but what I do have, I am want to share.

1. “You never play with us!” whine my offspring.
A. This is a falsehood- they wanted nothing to do with me, until i told them to turn off the: t.v., iPad, video game…etc.
Now they have come to seek me out & harass me with their long winded interpretations of 1990 Garfield episodes. They do this in hope that i go insane, and to save myself, i give in to their demands.

2. “You love so-and-so more then me.” whine my least favorite child (at that moment)
A. This is a tough one. i have two fiercely independent daughters, while my son likes to hang out with me. His first choice would be his sisters, if they allowed him in their vacinity. What my daughter’s see, is that i am hanging out with their brother, all the damn time. What i finally came up with is this, “Your brother seeks me out to talk (and talk and talk) all the time. He doesn’t have anyone else to hang out with. You are MORE THAN WELCOME to seek me out to talk…would you like to hang out & talk?…i didn’t thinks so”

B. I tell my children, part A, but I’ve also added at appropriate times…my favorite child is the one, “The one who is being the most helpful.” This only works when your children are little. Upon hearing liking the child who is most helpful, the kids tend to push each other out of the way to help. Unfortunately this doesn’t work as well when they are older. you have to use money to get any help from them.

C. The last guilt tri…answer that I have found that worked well for me is, “I love to snuggle & kiss, but you won’t let me do that anymore, so i had your sibling to snuggle with…would you like to snuggle? the answer is usually a grossed out, “no”

I wanted more children because, i think, my babies looked at me with their beautiful baby eyes, and i was starstruck. I was always starstruck with my babies. Those babies I wanted to be with, talk to, raspberry on the tummy with…to watch them learn how to crawl, walk & talk–ultimately they did learn those things…and my children left me behind because I had done it right.

I read in a magazine that the older we become, the happier we become. I thought that was true because most older people became slightly less…smart. That is not true. Older people know where I have been, where I am & where I am going BECAUSE they did the same damn thing. and they probably enjoy watching others go through the good, bad & the ugly & they survived it.

I think that older people tend to be happier because they have, finally, realized the key to happiness is…sleep. Sleep whenever they feel like it. Sleep wherever they happen to be sitting, no matter the time. Like a house cat.

I remember sitting in front of my Grandparents television, enduring yet another football game, only to jump out of my skin because my (beloved) grandfather had snored in his sleep. I remember thinking, how can he sleep with all this noise?
I understand now, he had finally begun to earn all the sleep he had missed taking care of his family.

In this picture, I have evidence of playing with my daughter.
I also have evidence that my son left me first. The only real parenting advice I can honestly say is successful- is to take lots of photographs & save the evidence.
BTW, I will edit tomorrow, its way after my bedtime.

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