Yesterday was pretty tough. My son is 10 years old. My son talks to me nonstop. I listen…mostly. I listen (mostly) because I know in a few years, he may not have anything to say to me. I do interrupt his babbling sometimes to offer unsolicited advice. I make it short, because who really likes to be lectured? Not me. Short & sweet. Get to the point. Do not beat a dead horse.
Here is an example. The other night, Justin Bieber came on the radio. My son says, “I HATE Justin Bieber.” I say to my son, “I feel very sorry for him.” My son asks me why. I said, “Imagine what it would feel like to be the most popular kid in the whole school for a few months, imagine everyone fighting for your attention. Then, one day, people start speaking badly about you, gossip, making things up, using strong words like HATE. I can’t begin to imagine what that feels like.” My son got it. No lecture. Just taking a moment to walk in another’s shoes.
Someone hurt my son, in a very public way. It was tough on me because there was nothing I could do to fix it. I was worried about school the next day, worried if children would hurt him further. I worried all day & then I picked him up from school…& I asked him about his day.
He said, “It was good.”
I said,”Really?!”
He said, “Mom, mean people who throw ash, get it right back in their faces.” ?!?!?!
“Who told you that?” I ask
“Nobody told me, it was in a book I read.” He answered. “It means- if somebody is mean, then that mean person will have something mean happen to them”
I had been powerless & angry. It had been a life lesson for him. He had become introspective in order to find the courage to face the crowd.
“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it” ~Nelson Mandela
Henry had triumphed. & I have been blown away by his courage & wisdom.
2me4art 
Young and wise… Sometimes, our children teach us many valuable lessons…
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Thank you so much. He shocked me to my core with that bit of wisdom. I was very proud of his courage. I would have begged to stay home for the rest of the year. 🙂 ~amy
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A thoughtful and wise boy- as well as being beautiful and handsome, all at the same time. That story makes my heart glad. You must be so proud of him.-Karen
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I am very proud of him. His courage is remarkable. He is very wise & thoughtful. At home we always try to share the big picture of events b/c the reasoning/consequences skills in children really don’t develop until late teens, early twenties. We have lots of living in another persons shoes talks. I think they are paying off. Also having a mom who is a bit broken has made him very thoughtful & giving. Tough 10 years for him. I wish he had known me when I was powerful. Thank you, Karen. ~amy
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Sounds like you have one great son!
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It is amazing what great perspective kids often have and a sort of natural wisdom!! It helps too to have a mother who answers questions in a thoughtful way to teach its not always the event but how you react to it that matters. Cute photo too!!
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Thank you so much, Judy. I’m sorry this thank you took so long to find you. ~amy
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That is profoundly wise. Big hug to both of you.
P.S. Your son rocks.
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(wipes tears from eyes) Hugs received & much needed. Thank you so much, Reggie- for saying just the right thing. ~amy
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