Can’t grow these if I got down on my knees & prayed to the god of the Petunia

Can't grow these if I got down on my knees & prayed to the god of the Petunia

Everywhere I go, they have above the concrete, in baskets, blasted by the sun for 18 hours a day & they still look like they just stepped out of a refreshing shower. I see them in large copper or metal drums being cooked alive & they don’t wilt, whimper, whine. They look as though God created them from tissue paper, but have the strength & endurance of titanium. Until I get them to my house, droopy as I take them out of the trunk, coughing & fainting from the execration of being moved from the tables sitting above the concrete parking lot at Lowes to my house. I plant them in the very best dirt (gosh, I’m an ass) money can buy. I put them in 12 hours of sun & in a week all the leaves are gone. Their stems look like the elbows & knees of a 6 foot tall 13 year old with one pathetic, pink saran wrap hanging on to life by sheer stupidity.
So I just take pictures of Petunia wherever I go & if no one is looking, whisper in their ears, “stuck up snob!” See, what I figure, no one ever comes to my house by choice & the petunia is a popularity seeking little brat. I am beneath its notice & nobody loves me, so I’m gonna go eat dirt. Not really, maybe a yogurt or something…
I’m gonna go tell my wholly flowers that do like me, that I like them too.

These ferns are in front of our house, I love them because they’ve got a wee purple to them. BUT my black thumb has struck again!

These ferns are in front of our house, I love them because they've got a wee purple to them.  BUT my black thumb has struck again!

On Monday, I had gone to Leaf & Petal, it was a great day, no cane & w/ little pain. & so I walked & looked & drooled (shhhh). I was trying to correct another mistake. Last year the spot beside my garage got 3 hours full sun, which I considered shade. So we plant 3 hydrangea & some other shade lover. They FRIED, DRIED & most died. Shade had become sun because my husband & his chain saw took the shade to the curb for the trash guys to take away. So I was going to fix it. I bought sun lovers, I got home after many a chore, very sore. The next morning I got that stomach bug. Threw up for hours (tMI?) slept on the bathroom floor. Wishing…anyway I got better or thought I had until S. showed me a UNOPENED can of tuna & I gagged. Two days pass…ive gained enough strength to pee the dogs & with shock & despair, I see toppled over, some dead, some half way there my ^#@&ing $70 dollars worth of plants I had left in their pots to plant the next day.
Anyway, I’m done with my tragic story, a dream really. A dream about a girl who wants to be able to have gardens blooming, but instead has moles who put holes in my daises & my black eyed susans & the birds who eat my blueberries & strawberries. And a dog that washed her face on a dead mole my cat killed. But this fern is nice.

Look at those faces

Look at those faces

Chickadee @ Cahaba heights (seems I put too many posts up at one time) So I will post one or 4 at a time. Never 2 or 3…..